Fashionable People, Questionable Things. | The Skinny on Skinny Jeans | Fashionable People, Questionable Things.

Ally: So, a while back I discussed my need for a pair of black skinny jeans. Reader Amy suggested I head to Garage where I might face mortification, but also may find exactly what I was looking for.

Off I went to Halifax Shopping Centre where I searched in vain at Banana Republic, Gap and Jacob for a pair of black skinnies to no avail. And then I spotted it. The tacky-ass, neon Garage sign. Please don’t get me wrong. There is a purpose for Garage’s existence. I just believe it is not for women over the age of 30. At 32, the only Garage I should be pulling into is one with a minivan in the suburbs. Word, the website says that Garage offers “casual clothes for teen girls”. It ain’t 1994, so I ain’t supposed to be shopping there.

I did it though. I went into Garage and found a killer pair of black skinny jeans and two long tank tops to wear with tunics over my jeans. Here is where I have a problem.

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Here we have fashion Goddess, Sienna Miller wearing a pair of black skinny jeans with a (rather frumpy but that’s not my point) tunic overtop. Is she wearing a belt? I think not.

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Here is fashion Goddess Nicole Richie wearing (blue) skinny jeans with rather horrifying shoes (not my point). Is she wearing a belt? I think not.

This is where skinny jeans fail me, and possibly where I will get a little TMI on you. I have no Kim Kardashian if you know what I’m saying.

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Still don’t understand what I’m trying to politely say?

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From behind, I do not look like one of those “rap guys’ girlfriends”. Nor from the front either, actually.

So, without fail, after wearing my jeans for a half hour, my jeans start to slide down and I spend the day yanking them up like a six year old on the playground wearing big girl clothes for the first time. How can I wear a cute tunic, or long tank, with my new skinny jeans without wearing a belt? I actually got out my maternity belly band to hold my jeans up under my long shirt without having the belt buckle look. Don’t worry, I put it away as fast as I pulled it out.

Help, friends. Help. Cause I want to look like this (sans A-Rod, but that’s not my point).

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L-A: I wish I could be of some use to you, but here’s the problem:

a) I am terrified of skinny jeans.

b) there has yet to be a pair of jeans invented that I can wear without a belt…and that don’t look like this:

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Sigh. Such is the plight of the girl with generous hips. I just want to find a pair of jeans that will let me wear tall boots and not look crappy.  Am I asking too much, Universe? Really?

But maybe Sienna and Nicole are wearing belts? How can you tell if they are or not? Sienna’s tunic looks big enough to be a castoff from The Biggest Loser & Nicole looks like she’s doing some kind of Stevie Nicks-wannabe outfit with her seventeen different layers of scarves on.  There is probably a belt on under there and you can’t see it. Either that or they are rich enough to have jeans custom made, which is totally possible.

In summary: I don’t believe in belt free jeans and I am not very helpful.

19 Responses to The Skinny on Skinny Jeans

  1. Jill says:

    I have a few pairs of skinny jeans that can be worn without a belt, but others that definitely need one. I settled on a fabric belt that isn’t particularly cute, but at least can’t be seen under most long tops.

  2. Jenerator says:

    Ally, I too have sought out the ‘best skinny jeans’ for ‘not the best body’ and I believe I have found them. Can you say Parasuco? Remember the pricey storefront on Crescent, in Monreal…? Winners has them (I have seen them in Bedford, Bayers Lake and awesome prices in Moncton.)

    These jeans come in Navy and a Coal black. They have just the right amount of stretch and they come up high enough as to avoid whale tail. You will feel these jeans pull down a bit but not so much that you need a belt. The lower legs (around the knees) are nice and snug. So, pull them up a bit at the knee (slight bunching), I call it the knee belt.

    Now it must be known, 2 years ago I bought THE pair of Skinny Jeans. Can’t beat ‘em. Also Parasuco, but get this they came to up to your belly button and zipped at the side. Hello??? Why Parasuco is not flooding the market with this style, I cannot say. These I also purchased at Winners.

    TIP when you do find a pair of Skinny Jeans that do everything you need them to do-wash them inside out in cold water and hang to dry. Never put them in the dryer or you’ll be buying them like underwear.

    Parasuco at Winners ($20-$24 per pair). Look in the Junior Trends Sections.

    One more thing, Levis has this new thing Curve ID http://us.levi.com/shop/index.jsp?categoryId=4370093&cp=3146849.3146879.3146880

    Be cool if they applied this theory to the Skinny Jean yeah…?

  3. Jen says:

    I have something similar to this that really helps. I believe you can order through their site for delivery to Canada. If not, I’m sure there are a few kicking around Ebay.

    http://www.invisibelt.com/

  4. Ann says:

    Magazines and fashion books are always saying that you can go to a tailor to have your pants taken in at the waist so they fit better. Have never done it myself, but if you got them so cheap at Garage anyway, it could be worth another $20 to have them tailored?

    • L-A says:

      Can you tailor jeans? Other than hemming, they’ve always seemed untailorable to me…but that’s a completely uninformed opinion.

      • Ann says:

        I think on What Not To Wear they’ve said you can get jeans tailored. It would probably just cost a bit more than regular pants, since the fabric would take more work.

  5. Kimberly R says:

    When I am wearing skinny jeans or leggings that just wont stay up, I end up tucking my cami into my pants and it helps them stay up. Since I wear a tunic overtop the cami, no one can tell they are tucked in.

  6. Sarah says:

    My washed-out skinny black jeans have a handy elastic waist band. But I guess that’s because they are from the Loved by Heidi Klum maternity line.

    I can’t help with this one….

  7. Intern Eden says:

    I have straight-leg jeans from Banana Republic that are juuust close enough to skinny that I can wear boots over them, but I can also wear boots under them if I want (which is my usual preference.) I recommend! But I think my shape was made for jeans – no hips and a bubble butt, which means I have never worn a belt with pants ever and always get confused by the idea.

  8. Amy says:

    Yay Garage! I second the tailoring suggestion. Then the tag in the back of the waistband will say GAGE and you can pretend you didn’t get them at the teenybopper store.

  9. Simone says:

    I feel your pain on the belt w/ skinny jeans.

    Yoga jeans by Second Denim in Montreal.
    Yes, YOGA jeans. I can hear the sighs now. I sighed too, until I tried a pair.

    They make a high rise skinny. I found their mid-rise needed a belt still. But they are seriously the most comfortable jeans ever, they won’t sag, & they hug every type of body. Try 1-2 sizes smaller than you usually wear.

    And no, I don’t work for them, but really, I never even thought I could get away with a skinny jean until I tried them!

    • MDubs says:

      My sister just bought a pair of Yoga Jeans. It’s true, they are amazing. They are sort of like a 90% jean and 10% jegging (so I guess you could say they are 95% jean and 5% legging but I digress).

      L-A, I probably just turned you off because I uttered (typed) the word “jegging”. Oopsy daisies.

      • L-A says:

        The word “jegging” never makes me happy. But if they are 90-95% jean, then I’d be willing to give them a try.

  10. Strawberry says:

    use a thin shoe lace to keep those jeans up!

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  12. Felicia says:

    I’m coming to this a bit late, but I am searching out the answer to this question as well. And I have to say, the amount of junk in your trunk doesn’t help. I have enough junk in my trunk to make Sir Mix-a-Lot a happy man, and my skinny jeans slide right down. I’m on the theory that since all skinny jeans are low rise, my smaller-than-my-giant-butt waist isn’t helping. I only have one pair though, so I’ll suffer looking like a 6 years old and yank them up when they start sliding low enough that my thongs are in danger of becoming public domain.

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