(Written last evening…)
Ally: Prepare yourself for some cheese over the next couple of paragraphs. I grew up a complete monarchist, and therefore tomorrow’s events bring me such ridiculous joy and excitement.
My Nan, Audrey, was a subscriber of Royalty and Majesty magazines. I would pore through them upon arrival, learning all about the various royal families and developing a deep love for all things Diana. These magazines would be brought down to the cottage in Smith’s Cove where Reader Jane and I would flip through the pictures and select our favourite outfits, then imagine ourselves wearing them while playing out the various characters. As with our Anne of Green Gables fantasy play, Jane would always get to play the “lead”, i.e. Anne/Diana where I would be humbled to play Diana/Sarah, Duchess of York. Jane was older. I obeyed.
While I’m excited to watch the wedding, I am a little misty eyed thinking of my late Nan, and how much she would have adored the events. She was quite the woman, my Nan. She never failed to make my mother drop in horror with some of her babysitting tactics. Particularly at the cottage. On one such occasion, my mother looked out the window to find her 13 year old daughter (that would be me) driving up the dirt road of the cottage driveway, blaring Patsy Cline. Nan was riding shotgun, holding on to her rye and water in a plastic cup for dear life. On another occasion mom was shocked to find her three children sitting in the cottage living room, rolling cigarettes like factory workers on an assembly line. Nan felt this was not only a good way to instill in us a strong work ethic, but also a sensible way to save money. I would agree with her actually. We’re all very hard workers to this day.
Nan most of all loved pomp and ceremony, so the Royal Wedding would be a hit with her. In fact, in 1981 Nan hosted a Royal Wedding watching party at her cottage. It was the only TV in the cottage community, so many trekked up the hill to watch the festivities. Not sure if rye and water was involved, but there were very likely Benson and Hedges being burned.
It seems hard to believe that we might have enjoyed that wedding dress, but Reader Jane and I were always into puffy sleeves at a young age. So perhaps we were down at a time with the old school ruffles. I imagine Kate’s dress will be quite different. I don’t dare to gamble on the designer of the day, but I would imagine her dress would be something simple. A la this:
L-A: Oh man. I wish I had a touching story like that about my nana and royal weddings. I have touching nana stories, but none of them relate to this. So I’m just going to do a run through of favourite royal fashion. Diana isn’t on the list. I loved her dress at as a kid, but that may have to do with a serious Anne of Green Gables kick (not unlike Reader Jane and Ally), making this the height of fashion for me:
So let’s start with Queen Victoria:
Actually, that aged as well as Diana’s. Or did Diana use Victoria as inspiration? I think I like a headpiece made out of giant ass jewels over plant life. Well, I would if I were royalty. As non-royalty, I might like plant life. But if I owned a country, I would demand to have all it’s jewels on my head.
Queen Elizabeth was so young and happy and classy. I love her. But I bet she hated her sister…
Because I like Margaret’s dress and tiara way better. Then again, Elizabeth got to be queen, so I guess she wins in the end.
I don’t love Princess Anne’s dress from wedding one, but I dig the early Princess Leia thing going on. However, the ’70s were kind to no one. Not even royals.
If I owned a country, I would banish all traces of the 1970s. I mean, they were probably fun at the time. I would have been all over disco and roller skating, but then the 80s would hit and I’d start looking back and every photo of me would have a golden filter and the lace would suck and I’d get depressed. And no one wants a depressed royal. So I’d banish all evidence of stuff that reminded me of the 1970s. And maybe the 1980s. Some call it despotism, I call it being an awesome Royal owner of a country.
I don’t know what Kate is going to wear (although, we did get insider info on the length of her train! We never get insider info!), but I think I’ll like it. If I don’t, well, I’ll get another royal wedding in approximately 30 years with the offspring of Wills and Kate (because let’s face it, no one will be nearly as excited when royals like Harry or Eugenie settle down).
Decent Pop Video of the Week