Ally: I have a friend who has gone to see Dave Matthews Band over five times. At least. Lainey, of Lainey Gossip, might be my Dave Matthews Band.

I’m (mostly) kidding, (Pink! would be my Dave Matthews Band) but getting to meet Lainey will go on my amateur blogger highlight reel. Right up there with L-A and I getting to sit on Santa’s lap.

That was a good day and an even better skirt.

The Faculty of Celebrity Gossip was presented by Vitamin Water, which, it has to be, said put on an incredible event. The food and drinks served up by Fred were delicious. Regarding the drinks though, when someone suggests I put “water” of any form in my cocktail I usually offer them a severe head tilt.

See you on Friday (by which I mean tonight), sweet sexy.

Source: All photos courtesy of Vitamin Water’s Flickr Page

Consider me wrong. That cocktail was delicious.

The event even had a delightful crest which made us all feel much more OK about the fact we were spending three hours talking about Tom and Katie.

Lainey kicked off the evening addressing this very fact, that we were actually going to sit in a room and dissect people’s personal lives, saying that it was no different than people studying bugs for a living. Sure!

Dean Lainey schools us in pop culture. Swoon.

I want you to look very closely at the above picture. See the lady in the purple shirt? Sure, she looks harmless but she steals things. That very night she stole my valedictorian prize. Let’s take a closer look shall we?

Oh, please, do enjoy the delicious snacks as well, purple lady. As JRDN (google it) says, “You can have it all”.

I have not been this devastated since Blake Lively took Leo Dicaprio to Italy.

[L-A in her editor's hat note: We've actually met the "lady in the purple shirt". Her name is Joan and she has attended FPQT events in the past. It didn't matter what the prize was. Ally just wanted bragging rights. I actually threw easy questions on the quiz just in case. Because I know full well Lainey isn't on Newsworld. I just didn't want to see the following on here:  "see that hussy in the striped shirt who was formerly known as my friend? she robbed me of my award!"]

[Ally in her I'm Still Hurting hat:  Joan ?Please know I call you "purple shirt lady" in jest. Take me to Fred with your gift certificate maybe? ]

Despite this immense disappointment, we enjoyed a fantastic evening. Best of which was that we got to sit up front with local celebrity bloggers Jill Mader and Leslie Flemming.

At this point of the evening, I’m saying something witty and everyone is laughing except for Jill. Why is that Jill? Were you not feeling well? Leslie is excused because she is drinking her delicious water cocktail.

Lainey and Vitamin Water will be continuing to travel the country for the Faculty of Celebrity Studies series. As well, Lainey will be posting some hilarious “how-to” articles on Vitamin Water’s tumblr page. The first one on wedding etiquette is one all wedding guests must read.

The tumblr page will also feature advice from Lainey. You can email her at asklainey@laineygossip.com or tweet your question with #asklainey. Her on-camera responses will be posted to the vitaminwater tumblr and YouTube page every month.

Lainey, thanks for coming to Halifax. Even though you weren’t Seth Cohen (apparently #SethSpotting 2012 is off, L-A will fill you in on that later), we felt important and stupid-looking standing next to you.

Someone knows how to pose for a camera. Hint, it’s not us.

Regretfully, I neglected to ask Lainey where her incredible dress and shoes came from. Instead, I talked about our mutual ill-advised crush on Eminem. This is why I would never cut it as a reporter on ETalk!

L-A: What Ally said.

But seriously, it was such a fun night. And not that I needed to justify my love of celebrity gossip, it was fun to talk smart about it for awhile. In case you’re wondering how it’s possible to make celebrity gossip smart (I already knew it could be. I studied TV), it’s all about this: the way we look at celebrity gossip says a lot about us and how we view the world and it’s all about the business of celebrities (they are a brand with marketers and communications people).

I also really appreciated that at least five times during the evening, Lainey had no problem letting her “feminist flag fly”. Golf claps to her. Not a lot of people like to let that flag fly. It’s often, “mumble, sure I’m a feminist, but…” or “why do we need it?” (the answer to the latter is a discussion for another day).

As for our posing? Once I master eyeliner, I am going to start to work on how to pose better already. God that’s embarassing.

Thanks again Lainey for coming! Sorry if we fangirled too much!!

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2 Responses to We’re bug scientists. Or Something.

  1. Jill says:

    I saw that photo too! I am the worst. I can only assume I was aware I was being photographed and decided to look incredibly awkward instead of attractive in any way.

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