Ally: Welcome to Wednesday and FPQT! If you’re new here, this is basically all you need to know.
Have a nice day. Come again.
Listen, I don’t know how to explain Adam Sandler. I’ve had a crush on him forever. I get that he would probably make odd sounds in the bathroom and likely spend most of the day clearing his throat in that gross boy way, but he’d make me laugh and I’d be the pretty one, so…there’s that.
We’re going to meet to review the rules of the Fantasy Pretend Boyfriend League. There’s a lot of questions L-A did not anticipate when she gave birth to this concept. Basically, things may change. Things that fall outside of me trading Eminem ever. Or The Yelawolf, but I don’t reckon anyone really wants him around.
So as you would expect when you come to the site and see it’s me who has started a post and not L-A, I don’t quite have a theme for today’s entry. It’s more of a list of WTFs.
Random Hump Day Wtf #1: This is not ok, Vogue.com UK
I mostly enjoy Michelle Williams. Mostly. Lately she’s been dipping a little bit too much into the Hipster Pot of Gold, but I try to judge quietly. When a subsidiary of Vogue comes out and applauds an outfit that is just plain all kinds of wrong, I feel justified in speaking out.
Really? “Today’s downtime style muse”? With that logic my current outfit of a five-year-old white t-shirt from Garage and my husband’s boxers is downright cover worthy.
(L-A: Mere moments before reading what Ally had to say on this, I was reading about it on Go Fug Yourself. They are on the same page as Ally).
Random Hump Day Wtf #2: Wtf is a “Monroe Piercing”?
Someone on Twitter this week mentioned they were “getting a Monroe”. I took to Google.
Do any of you have one? I need to see it in real life.
Random Hump Day Wtf #3: How can you even front on Scarlett?
Do you remember when the “media” got some poor photos of Scarlett wearing a bikini on the beach? I’m not even going to link to them, that’s how ridiculous they were. The cameras discovered…are you ready for this? CELLULITE.
Unfortunately I cannot relate to cellulite as I am completely flawless, I’m sure you all are as well. Rant about our stupid and unobtainable body aspirations aside, Scarlett Johansson is one of the most beautiful women around. This is not debatable.
Here’s her casual wear out in Paris the other evening. Please take note Vogue UK.
Haters can suck it.
Random Hump Day WTF #4: When Lady Gaga has to pull a Miley Cyrus
I am not Lady Gaga, however. I need to be ridiculous on Twitter to get all kinds of attention (actually, no one @replied me on this one which means my followers obviously want the selfies to keep coming). Lady Gaga does not need to take PR advice from Miley Cyrus and get her fans to emit tweet orgasms over the thought of her dying her hair brown.
At least you know it’s boring, Gaga. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? Remember this?
(Kid Friendly version!)
Post-Publish Urgent Update: Avril Lavigne is set to marry the ringleader of Nickleback. This is amazing, amazing news.
Crappy Pop Music Video of the Week
- Please @LaineyGossip, we're begging you. Tell us your thoughts on Mariah's latest video. What would @Eminem think?! ow.ly/kUkzF 1 week ago
- Sometimes, shopping gives us feelings. @miggitymel has a few when she hits the mall in search of a basic black flat. bit.ly/16ioXvI 1 week ago
- Friday Favourites are hair dids, cheap shoes, feelings in gifs, and feminsim + Beyonce: bit.ly/10406sL 2 weeks ago
- Bus driver has on studded belt, bejeweled headband and bedazzled cuff. Why the hell not. #metrotransitfashionreport 2 weeks ago
- I'm so sad @AllyGarbs isn't here for smart lady gossip talk about motherhood at @LaineyGossip. #rumorestimmortalis /la 3 weeks ago